how to remember a name {and the face that goes with it}

I’m sure this has never happened to you..

You meet someone at a party or conference, you chat awhile, make small talk, even get somewhat acquainted. As they turn to walk away, their name spills out of your head like fine sand in an hourglass. Or better yet, you forgot it in the middle of your conversation.

Nope, I’ve never done that either…no siry. {ahem}

With all the excitement building for the upcoming Blissdom conference, I’ve been thinking about this little problem, so common to us human beings. I thought, Wouldn’t it be cool to remember these ladies names when I see them in a few weeks? Granted, name tags are worn almost full time, from my experience. But how good does it make you feel when someone remembers your name from a prior meeting or online interaction…when you’re not wearing a name tag? Pretty special, I’d venture to say.

Then I had a flashback. I learned a little trick one time, that I’d sort of forgotten about.

My first job fresh out of college was “Executive Assistant” to the pastor of a pretty good-size church in San Diego, CA. Really, it was a glorified title for “church secretary”.

One of the best things about that job was the pastor I worked for…a very godly, humble man who made every person he encountered feel special. He had a way of remembering a person’s name after just one meeting…and that was no small feat in a congregation of 750 regular attenders.

“How do you remember people’s names so effortlessly?” I asked him one day.

He began to explain to me that it wasn’t as “effortless” as it appeared…but still rather simple. Here basically what he told me…

1. Pay attention to the conversation. Don’t worry about what you’re going to say next (I never do that either…). Pay close attention to the details…where they are from, how many kids they have, if they have strikingly blue eyes. Some detail that “sticks out” to you.

2. Keep a notepad (real or virtual) handy. Very shortly after the conversation, while its still fresh in your mind, take a split second to jot down the person’s name and a few key details. Pull out a little note pad, or better yet, at a venue like Blissdom where business cards abound, jot that info down on the back of the card they just handed you. Or, whip at that iPhone and open Notes. Jot it down and act like you’re checking your email or making your next move with Words with Friends. 30 seconds and you’re done.

3. Review. Finally, sometime before you’re bound to encounter your new-found acquaintances again, take time to go over your handy notes. Try to put the name with the face with the details. Taking this extra time will pay off very soon.

Recently, I had a chance to put this little method to the test and it totally worked. I met a woman who has my middle name. I made a mental not (ok, I kind of skipped #2, but it was just one person and not 50 at the same time…). The next week, I saw her again and greeted her by name. She lit up. I was thrilled to be able to make the connection and make her feel that our interaction mattered.

Your Turn: What are your tips for remembering a person’s name? I’d love to hear!